Unlearning Fragility: Moving from Actor to Accomplice

“Racism is bigger than conscious hate….” -Scott Woods


Central components to begin:

  1. Establish the indisputable reality that all white people have some degree of internalized racism and will perpetuate racist beliefs against people of color.

  2. Have adequate (and ever-evolving) skills of self-awareness; vulnerability; reflection; mindfulness; self-care; distress tolerance; emotion regulation; intentional action.


A. Understand your own motivation and intentions for engaging in antiracist work (internally and externally):

  • Do necessary self-awareness work

  • Do necessary vulnerability work

  • Practice reflection (journal, etc)

  • Talk with other white people about these things; name your fears, confusions, hopes

B. Ask the ‘right’ questions:

  • What has allowed me to remain ignorant about how to interrupt racism?

  • Asking how, NOT if, I participate in and uphold racism and white supremacy.

  • Do I confuse comfort with safety?

  • What am I willing to do to recognize, learn, and adapt my behaviors to become less likely to act on internalized racism?

C. Define core terms for a working understanding of what is being talked about in a given context so you don’t waste time arguing due to differing understandings of words:

  • White fragility

  • Whiteness

  • White privilege

  • Actor; ally; accomplice


D. Understand the concept of the continuum of racism that all white people land on/move across, based on the work they are/aren’t doing to become more antiracist:

  • Again, engage in ongoing (radical) acceptance of the indisputable reality we began with.

  • Ask yourself: In what ways have I benefited from institutional and cultural racism?

  • What internalized racial biases do I possess? How do these manifest?


E. Beginning to act more and more in alignment with antiracist ideas and actions:

  • Work with/take private time to process all of the above as often as you need; it’s a lot.

  • Be willing (and prepared: see section A) to move into (vs. away from) uncomfortable conversations.

  • Welcome, and ask for, critical feedback.

  • Learn to listen (not just hear).

Resources:

  1. Dr. Robin DiAngelo talk

  2. Actor to Accomplice literature

  3. Mindfulness in Discussions of Race + Trauma

  4. White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo

  5. The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander

  6. How To Be An Antiracist by Ibram X. Kendi

  7. All About Love by bell hooks

  8. Pleasure Activism by adrienne maree brown

  9. Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat-Zinn

  10. Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change by Pema Chodron